24 weeks + mother's day 0.5 + an inappropriate sonographer

so this was a pretty okay week. we started sunday going to our friends' daughter's 1 year birthday party at a restaurant. i, of course, had to be wheeled around and stay in my seat once we got to our table. though i was glad to have seen everyone, it sucked that i couldn't walk around to talk to as many people as i wanted to.

later that night, i was touched and happy to have celebrated my "first" Mother's day. i didn't think it really counted cause the twins aren't born yet. but, my families (mine and mark's) all thought it counted. they sent me cards and gave me small but very meaningful gifts. i was so touched and felt so loved that i cried... a lot. because of the bed rest, we decided to just order food and eat and celebrate with mark's family here at our house. it was nice and simple and quiet. the best part was our nephew greeting us all a happy mother's day!

mid-week, mark and i had lunch with a friend of ours that's also pregnant with her first, a boy. we got to swap some pregnancy stories here and there. then we got to stories about what her husband is and isn't doing to help her during her pregnancy. let's just say, i'm ever so blessed and thankful for mark and all that he has done for us and for me especially to make this pregnancy go as smoothly and stress-free as possible.

thursday, we had another appointment with dr. matia - i have to see her every week now. i thought everything was going to be pretty routine - check my cervix length, check the babies, check out. well it wasn't. we waited in the waiting room and got called in by a sonographer that we hadn't seen before. she seemed okay at first. then she was just plain rude and mean and had the crappiest bedside manner i had ever experienced. she mentioned several times as to how hungry she was and how it's lunch time for her. because of this, she rushed through all the scanning and this irritated the living hell out of me. i understand that she was hungry, but that doesn't give her the right to rush through a patient's appointment and scans. she has a job to do and if she can't do it right, she needs to get someone else to do it. she commented about how it was nice that my feet and ankles weren't swollen like most other pregnant women and i said it's probably because of the compression socks that i had been wearing. she asked where i had gotten the idea and i said i googled it and then asked my obgyn about it to make sure. she responded with something along the lines of "you shouldn't google things to get medical advice." did she not hear about the part where i asked my obgyn if it was okay? ugh!

later, when the scanning was over, she again commented on how i have no stretch marks on my belly yet and how nice that must be. i again said that i googled something about stretch marks and she snapped at me and told me, "you need to stop googling things and ask your doctor with the medical degree!" it took a hell of a lot of restraint for me to not get up and punch her. i was so extremely mad! after entering whatever she had to on the report she just up and left me with all the now-cold sonogram gel all over my belly and cold vaginal ultrasound gel (for the cervix check) all over my vagina and didn't even bother to hand me any papertowels to wipe any of it off or put my underwear back on. it wasn't until 10 minutes later when dr. matia walked in that i was given papertowels to take it all off and put my underwear back on. unfortunately, i was so concerned with the results of the sonograms that i forgot to tell dr. matia how upset i had gotten with that horrible sonographer. i fully plan to make sure that she will never ever do any of my examinations ever again.

anyways... the twins and i are all doing okay. my cervix hadn't gotten shorter and the twins were doing well. reagan is finally catching up to lincoln's weight and they are measuring at good sizes. there is still the concern about lincoln's little heart, but dr. matia said his heartbeat is nice and strong and well within the normal range. thank you God.

other than all those things, the rest of the week was nice and uneventful. i stayed in bed for the rest of the weekend while the twins went crazy in my uterus and mark worked on one of our cars.

hope everyone else's week was less chaotic than ours!

23 weeks + a wheelchair + the tiny humans

another week, another finding. let's start from the beginning...

so we went to finally get a wheelchair and a handicap placard so i could get around more but still be resting. it has taken some getting used to maneuvering around and i have noticed so much. so many stores and other places of business are not handicap compliant or their handicap compliant equipment are either insufficient, broken or non-existent. i'm thinking i need to do something about this. perhaps write to these places of business that we've encountered or write to the better business bureau about it. i'm also learning how completely rude and lazy non-handicapped people are.

we went to a restaurant where they have parking designated specifically for expectant mothers. we saw it and were about to park there when this guy coming from oncoming traffic signaled before us. we let him have it only to see him and his wife get out of the car and the woman was waaaay too old to be pregnant!! i was livid! had i not already felt physically drained at the time, i would have said some very choice words to them. and wouldn't you know it, they got out of the car and practically ran into the restaurant as to not be seen how rude they truly are! some people!

anyways... the rest of the week seemed to be pretty uneventful till my appointment with dr. matia came on thursday. along with our sonogram, they brought in a pediatric cardiologist to look at the babies' hearts. reagan was looking fine, but lincoln was a bit concerning. apparently, there is a blood vessel that leads to his heart at the moment that isn't open wide enough. though his heartbeat is okay, they fear that the blood vessel might close too soon and that will stop the bloodflow to his heart. it hurts me so much that i can do nothing to stop these things from happening to my little man. all i can do is pray the God takes care of him in the ways i can't right now.

after lincoln's problem came mine. my cervix was shortening more. it was at 2.19 inches or so the last time and now it's around 1.97 inches. so i have to really be careful of the times i'm on my feet. so, i'm practically confined to the bed or a chair unless i realllllly have to be up. i know it's what needs to be done, but i'm getting restless and anxious as my due date is getting closer. there is just so much i want done before they arrive but i have no freedom, or energy for that matter, to do any of it!

i hope things get better sooner than later. meanwhile, here are a few pictures from the twins' last sonogram...

lincoln

lincoln

reagan

reagan

21 weeks + bed rest + strong love

so here we are... 21 weeks! this week, other than the emergency surgery, was pretty uneventful really. i suppose it's due to the fact that i've been stuck in bed on bed rest.

it has been an emotionally draining week though. with the news of having to get the surgery and the twins being in danger of early delivery and possible loss, my emotions went haywire. i was, as any parent would be, worried out of my mind. i found myself crying and panicking more than usual and couldn't control it at all. i was like a ticking time bomb of tears. again, as usual, i was scared that my depression was about to take over and win again. i was glad that towards the end of this week, mark and i had a long talk (after a really uncontrollable bout of crying) and he reassured me that it was normal to be this worried... what parent would be right?

i say it over and over again, but i am so extremely thankful for mark. he has been my rock and my light in the darkness. through all the ups and downs, he has remained by my side and never wavered. the things we have gone through are the things that are usually designed to tear couples apart. how lucky, fortunate, and blessed are we that those things have only made our relationship and love stronger than i could have ever imagined!? God truly blessed us beyond our expectations.

my post-op follow-up appointment with dr. matia is tomorrow morning. please, please, please pray for us that i am healing well and that the twins are still doing well too.

till next time... have a great week y'all!

a sonogram + a big change in plans

so we went in on monday for our 20 week anatomy sonogram and scan. it was a long appointment. we got to see the twins squirming all over the place and got to see their faces via 3D ultrasound. it was amazing!

we're thinking that lincoln looks more like mark and that reagan looks more like me... at least from what we got to see. you be the judge.

lincoln jude

reagan elizabeth

so the sonographer took a ton of photos throughout the exam. like i said, it was a long appointment. then, my high risk obgyn, dr. pamela matia, came in to discuss the results and photos.

first, we discussed the twins. they were measuring really well and were looking great. lincoln was weighing in at approximately 1 lb and reagan was weighing in at about 12 ounces. as i just typed that, regan just head-butted me pretty hard! haha! they were both super squirmy during the whole exam and at one point towards the end of the sonogram, lincoln did a full on somersault and just flipped completely! it was so funny and amazing to see it happen!

next, we discussed me. this is where it got serious. according to the vaginal ultrasound prior to the sonogram, my cervix was shorter than my last appointment. this was not good. if this continued, my cervix could open up and push me into preterm labor and delivery and we could lose the twins. i think my heart dropped about 500 feet below sea level at that point. all i could hear was "could lose the babies" over and over again in my head. you ever get punched in the gut when you really really really have to pee? that's how i felt.

we were given 2 options: 1. bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy or 2. surgery to close up my cervix to prevent the preterm labor - a McDonald Cerclage.

option 1 would have been a hail mary type approach - hope for the best, prepare for the worst. but there was no guarantee that the babies would survive. i didn't like those odds at all. option 2 would get us to at least 36 weeks gestation. i'd have to modify all my activities to basically nothing unless absolutely necessary, but the odds of the babies surviving would be significantly greater than option 1. it was a no-brainer: we were going with option 2.

so what did this mean...
1. all plans we had were cancelled until further notice. we had to cancel our babymoon/friends' wedding trip to the caymans that we were scheduled to leave for next week. we had to cancel all our baby-prep classes that were all scheduled to start this week. i had to cancel my attendance for aforementioned friend's bridal shower brunch scheduled for this coming saturday.
2. surgery was scheduled A.S.A.P. dr. matia put me on the surgical schedule for the next morning (tuesday, 11:15am)
3. bed rest until further notice. after surgery, i would get to go home the same day, but would be put on strict bed rest until my follow up appointment next week. i would only be able to get up to go to the bathroom. if i wanted to bathe or shower, it'd have to be super short. otherwise, i'm stuck in bed.

so where are we now...
2 days post-op and doing well - as far as i know. not much bleeding and discharge but there's some cramping pain and my back is sore from the spinal tap because they can't put me fully under 'cause of the pregnancy. the twins are still squirmy so i'm glad and not worried about them right now.

mark's relieved and been the best dr./nurse husband. i'm sure he's still worried inside, but he never really shows it - at least not to me. i really could not have been more blessed with such a caring and loving life partner.

so for now, we're (me and the twins) are just resting and recovering. i'm getting restless and bored, but i know i have to stay put and take care of myself and the twins. c'est la vie! now, just praying that this week goes by fast and that my follow up appointment next week goes well. wish us luck!